A Call for Help: How to Know When You Need Therapy

In a world that constantly urges self-reliance and independence, it can be difficult to know when you need some help. Many people ponder the question of whether their pain is worth seeking professional help or if they should act more “disciplined” or “resilient.” However, knowing when to seek therapy is important for your mental health.

It may not be as easy as identifying a broken foot or bruised arm, but mental distress creates symptoms. Symptoms do not exist in isolation and they may only be tree branches connecting to a larger trunk of psychological turbulence. In this article, we will cover some key signs that it may be time to find a therapist. As a reminder, seeking therapy does not mean anything negative about you. The role of therapy is to understand and heal wounds, which starts with listening to what hurts.

Listen to Internal Cues

First, it’s imperative to recognize the full extent of your struggle. This means no downplaying negative feelings or saying you “shouldn’t” feel what you're feeling. It's necessary to accept, not approve, that you are feeling exactly what you feel right now. Looking at your pain is not complaining or whining. It's gathering information from the only true authority on what's happening in your head: you. To gain some insight into your internal experience, please ask yourself the following questions:

Do you feel an underlying experience of worry, sadness, hopelessness, or anger?

Do your thoughts, emotions, or physical sensations disrupt your functioning?

Do you find yourself unable to cope with or manage daily stress and/or unable to perform everyday tasks?

Does your struggle impact your work, responsibilities, or relationships?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, it may be beneficial to seek therapy. The more you answer yes to, the more likely it may be that there are deeper cognitive and emotional issues at play. To pinpoint where your struggles are, let’s explore areas of life that are commonly affected by psychological distress.

Relationship Functioning

It is pivotal to evaluate the state of your relationships when seeking therapy. While it may feel like your stress may only be impacting you, sometimes our internal distress can come out to impact our relationships. Please consider the following questions:

Does your struggle impact any of your interactions with others? 

Do you frequently spark conflict and argue with others?

Do you avoid conflict and/or withdraw yourself from social situations?

Do you find it difficult to maintain deep relationships?

These difficulties can be present in any relationship either it be romantic, social, or familial. Answering yes to any of the questions above could be a sign of internal experiences affecting outside relationships. If your relationships are affected by your mental health, therapy can help you effective strategies for coping with emotions and interacting with others. Additionally, if you have others in your life commenting or expressing concern about your health or well-being, it may be worth listening to. 

Physical Functioning

Your body can experience symptoms as a direct result of psychological distress. Physical health and mental health are inherently linked, and some physical sensations could indicate the presence of unaddressed psychological issues. Please consider the following questions:

Do you frequently experience headaches or migraines?

Do you experience insomnia and difficulties either falling asleep or waking up?

Do you experience stomach pain or other digestive issues?

Do you feel any chronic pain in any area of your body not related to a direct physical cause? 

If you answered yes to any of the questions above, therapy may be beneficial for you to explore the root causes of these symptoms. If left unaddressed, physical and mental symptoms can start to affect your work.

Occupational Functioning

It is important to reflect on how your struggles may be impacting your functioning at work. Any sort of internal distress can be highlighted when you are having to perform at your best. Please consider the following questions: 

Do you struggle to sustain your attention or energy at work?

Do you struggle to achieve your goals or milestones due to stress or distraction?

Do you struggle with staying motivated or feeling fulfilled by your job?

If it be a full-time job or an educational program, mental health is the foundation of your ability to succeed or find fulfillment. If you answered yes to any of the questions above, therapy may provide opportunities for guidance and reflection to overcome obstacles or realize your current path is not for you.

Routine Functioning

Our life consists of patterns and themes. These include daily activities or tasks that require sufficient energy and attention. If it be hobbies or chores, these can be impacted by mental distress that would benefit from therapy. Please consider the following questions:

Do you find yourself frequently making choices that result in negative outcomes?

Do you engage in unhealthy habits and have difficulty creating new ones?

Do you lose interest or pleasure in activities you once found fulfilling? 

Any pattern of behavior that leads to feelings of pain or distress is worth exploring. If you answered yes to any of the questions above, therapy can help through developing an understanding of your motivations, behaviors, and patterns. Behavior does not exist in isolation. It is formed and sustained by context, which you can further explore with a mental health professional.

I Need Therapy, Now What?

If you are open to exploring the depths of your own experience including your history of thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and relationships, then therapy can be a good choice for you. To be clear, therapy is not all sunshine and rainbows, as it often dives into deep and uncomfortable memories and truths. Psychotherapy is much like massage therapy in that we target the knots which are the result of tension, overuse, or injury. If you are brave enough to seek therapy, this process can be the start of a profound journey of personal growth and healing. 

Search for a Therapist

Therapy can come in a variety of forms, that is why it's best for you to find a therapist that fits you and provides the services you need. Online directories are a great way to begin this search, such as Psychologytoday.com, TherapyDen.com, or FindaTherapist.com. Once you find a therapist who has the right expertise, modality of therapy, and takes your insurance, you will likely attend an intake session.

The Initial Assessment

It’s important to discuss what a therapy intake is, as it’s one of the most daunting aspects of going to therapy. Essentially, you complete a whole lot of paperwork before you meet a therapist to determine if you’re a good fit for them and if they’re a good fit for you. You will tell them about everything listed above from your internal experiences, your career, your relationships, physical sensations, and daily routines. This goes on for about 50-60 minutes before you wrap up and begin your therapeutic journey or meet with another therapist who would better serve your needs.

Starting Therapy

As a therapist, I want to acknowledge how much courage this takes. To walk into a room, or join a telehealth call, and to tell a stranger all about the intimate details of your life. While it’s difficult, the process itself is liberating. You can speak about your life experience and do so with certainty that you are being listened to without judgment or ridicule. It’s a leap of faith, but by attempting therapy you are proving to yourself that your life matters. That your pain is real and worth bringing out in the open air to be validated, explored, and healed. 

If you would like to start your own therapy journey today, please go to greatlakesmentalhealth.com to learn more. 

Thank You for Reading!